Simple Living is Not so Simple


The trouble with simple living is that, though it can be joyful, rich, and creative, it isn't simple.
~Doris Janzen Longacre

No one ever said that when they grow up they want to be “overwhelmed”. Sadly, that is exactly what most of my clients express when they call me for an intervention. What they are so desperately seeking is a simpler way in their day-to-day. Many times that is in terms of their “stuff” and their “time”. They conclude that “stuff” is making them, their relationships and their environment sick. Change rarely happens on a voluntary basis, but when the desire to change becomes a priority in ones life, I have noticed some similarities that contribute to a simpler meaningful lifestyle.

1. Limiting material possessions to what is needed and/or cherished.
2. Meaningful work, whether paid or volunteer.
3. Quality relationships with friends and family
4. Joyful and pleasurable leisure activities
5. A conscious and comfortable relationship with money
6. Connection to community, but not necessarily in formal organizations
7. Sustainable consumption practices
8. Healthy living practices, including exercise, adequate sleep and nutritious food
9. Practices that foster personal growth, spirituality, journal writing and up-lifting reading.
10. Connection to nature and delighting in spending time in nature regularly.
11. Aesthetic beauty in personal environment.
12. Living in harmony with values and integrity.


As in any lifestyle change, I always say to take it slow. You might want to include one or two of these practices this year. Next year, you may want to add on a few more. What is most important is connecting with your true self and deciding that you are worth the change.

Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius - and a lot of courage - to move in the opposite direction.
~E.F. Schumacher

Website of the month:
www.stresslesscountry.com

Simple Living: Hope for the New Decade

In the not too distant future, our thoughts will turn toward the holidays and all the trappings, some good, but most nerve -racking. My friends complain each year that the joy of the holidays seem to be overshadowed by the rush-rush and have-to’s, out of tradition and guilt.

This year, I have hope.

The Santa Claus image of material goodies tied to those who have been nice seems to be eroding from our fabric. In its place, meaningful and deepening experiences are replacing the tinsel-laden trappings of surface expressions. The continued recession has had a profound effect, and this one is for our own good.

However, I see a big question mark on many faces. My friends seem to know what they want to do, they just don’t seem to know how to do it. Here are six tips to get you moving toward a more meaningful Holiday.

Tip #1
Plan ahead. This is the perfect time of year to sit down with your family before the leaves begin to fall and discuss what you loved about last year's holiday and what you did not. Not everyone will express his or her delight in visiting Aunt Martha. There may be a need for compromise. Get everyone’s input and make this year one that everyone feels excited about.

Tip#2
Research the meaning behind your holidays. Why do we have Christmas trees? What exactly is Kwanza and how did it begin? What is the central meaning behind the shamash on the menorah? Give your family a task to find out why you celebrate the way you do. Instead of doing things out of habit, learn the reason for the season.

Tip #3
Avoid Debt. Make sure you have a budget before giving in to the mindless consumerism onslaught at the mall. Make sure everyone understands the reason behind the budget and get creative. The best gifts I have received over the years didn’t cost a thing, only the time and talent of the giver.

Tip #4
Avoid stress. Add into your schedule time for the unexpected. The days will become shorter, both in terms of daylight and it seems in terms of minutes. Don’t sweat the small stuff, go with the flow and laugh more at the interruptions of the day.

Tip#5
The gifts. Make a new tradition. Instead of many meaningless gifts under the tree or beside the menorah, consider one gift that the person has wanted all year. From my perspective people don’t know what they want until they see a commercial or someone else’s toy. Start now and do some diligent research on each member of your family. Making it memorable, both in time and gifts, is what makes our memories pleasant.

Tip#6
Our family began a new tradition a couple of years ago. During the year, we sought out one charity that we felt we would like to contribute to. At Christmas each member gave to that charity and wrote a letter and put it on the tree inside an ornament explaining why that charity was important to them. Giving to those less fortunate is a great way to bring a new focus to the season.

There are as many ways to celebrate the holidays as there are people. I hope this list will be a beginning to inspire you to take your holidays to the next level.

I’d love to hear how you celebrated simply and with meaning.

Less is More: Conscious Consumption

A professional organizer’s role has been what I call the backdoor approach to lifestyle choices. We are called into an environment when the clutter and chaos have reached a tipping point in the lives of our clients. More often than not, the consumption patterns of our clients lie buried in their unconscious.

Prior to September 2008, little thought was given to the quantity of material possessions and less to the quality of those items. Our Gross National Product determined the health of our nation and while our consumption patterns ran amok, in reality, we were no longer healthy, but getting economically sicker by the day. September 2008 landed us in the hospital on life support. Now the commercial buzz is beginning to stress new lifestyle changes. But what those advertisers are not doing is telling you just how to do that. They are appealing to your better nature, but at the same time hoping you just keep on keeping the same old buying habits.

Living simply has become the new catch phase, but no where are there truly practical explanations on how to do so. We are left once again on our own to develop new changes and every one seems to have a question mark on their foreheads as to how to do so. In my previous blogs, I have stated that living simply is first and foremost changing the way we think. So here is one great tip to get you started.

It’s cold in NY where I live and every store at the mall has 70% off signs in the stores. There are retail bargins galore! But a bargain is not a bargain if the item just sits in the bag, or you already own 5 other white sweaters and the likely hood of you wearing that new sweater more than 3 times is next to nil.

So before you decide to spend the gas money and venture into the mall, make a list of what you truly need. Become conscious of what your needs are versus your wants. This is huge. Buying quality is also very important. Buying only what you love will begin to reduce the overload in your life. Make a pact with yourself and decide that if you are going to buy that fabulous white cashmere sweater, when you get home, you must donate 3 of the others. Buying with intent and purpose and not just what is available will drastically change your consumption patterns and make not only shopping mindful, but your thoughts about your material possessions will change.

Also understand that when you purchase an item, you are not only spending your money outright, but that there are hidden costs to that sweater. There are upkeep costs (like the cleaning) electricity cost in running the washing machine, detergent or dry-cleaning costs. There are also storage costs, like the canvas storage bag to contain the sweater during the summer months.

As the professional organizing industry matures, we are no longer going to be the backdoor consumption savior. Our professional focus needs to be on front door lifestyles. Who better to educate one-on-one to truly make transformative changes in the way we look at our life, our economy our nation, and even our world.

~Eileen Koff, CPO

Less is More: R-E-S-P-E-C-T

On September 23, 2008, Oprah‘s guest was renown financial advisor Suze Orman. Suze and Oprah went to visit Jose and Jill in their RV parked outside the studio. The following is taken from Oprah’s web site:

Suze has good news for Jose and Jill. Thanks to years of financial planning and diligent savings, she says they can continue their cross-country adventures for years to come. "This is a couple that’s done everything right," Suze says. "They have a serious sum of money in both of their retirement accounts. They just didn’t want to touch it. They have money coming in…there is so much money there that as long as they continue to live like this, they're fine."

How did Jose and Jill put away such a sizeable sum? For five years, Jill says they lived off Jose’s salary and banked her income, which Suze says is the greatest decision they made. They also spent years researching their retirement plan. "From a financial planning perspective, we kind of did the budget," Jill says. "We did the spreadsheet and we said what’s inflation going to cost us? What’s our rate of return going to be? What are we going to pay for fuel? What are we going to pay for food?"

Suze says more families should follow Jose and Jill’s lead. "Fabulous, fabulous, fabulous, you two. You are seriously on the financial road for the rest of your lives."

That’s wonderful financial news for the two of them. But what does that have to do with simple living? On the program Suze makes a profound comment. (Not found on the web site.) She looks around the RV and notices how very organized and clean it is. I must admit, it did look amazing! She then told Oprah that she bets that every cabinet, drawer, and closet has just what is needed…all in order. Oprah took her challenge and with Jill’s “okay,” Oprah began looking in every cabinet, drawer, and bathroom to see if what Suze said was correct. Sure enough it was.

Then Suze said something I will never forget. She said (and I’m paraphrasing) that those who are in debt are disorganized, in contrast to people who respect their money and their financial future. She said that the issue is all about respect. If you respect your money, then what you buy you will take care of. If you are in debt because you have maxed out on credit cards and need serious financial intervention, her research shows that the “stuff of life” is not treated with respect and those material goods end up disorganized and cluttered.

At that point I believe tears were rolling down my eyes. Suze had uncovered an incredible truth. In these uncertain economic times, how much respect to we treat our finances? Are we willing to continue to live as if nothing has changed and buy according to our emotions? Will we continue to treat our material goods with the same disrespect and will the clutter continue?

I challenge you to look deep within and see if there is room for growth and change. This is a great day to re-examine what you believe about your relationship to money. I pray God deepens your insight. As I continue to uncover these truths regarding simple living, I am seeing that it is so much more than dealing with our material world. It affects every area of our decisions. What and how we spend says a lot about what we value and respect and how we treat our possessions says a lot about our relationship and respect to the money God has entrusted to us.

~Eileen Koff, CPO

Less is More: A Challenge to Design Your own Blueprint for Simple Living

In past blogs regarding simple living, I have made many references that this new lifestyle is harder and more multifaceted than would appear on the surface. To cultivate a simpler lifestyle, we must search deep within and begin to let go of the world’s measure of success. This truly is hard, but with God’s direction you can begin. What we need now is a blueprint on what living a simpler lifestyle looks like. I would like to offer the following points to begin your blueprint:

1) Limiting material possessions to what is needed and/or cherished.
2) Meaningful work, whether paid or volunteer, ideally spending no more than 30 hours per week. (in order to make time for items 3-12 below)
3) Quality relationships with friends and family.
4) Joyful and pleasurable leisure activities.
5) A conscious and comfortable relationship with money.
6) Connection to community, but not necessarily in formal organizations.
7) Sustainable consumption practices.
8) Healthy living practices...including exercise, adequate sleep, and nutritious food.
9) Practices that foster personal growth, spirituality, and prayer...Bible groups and journal writing, for example.
10) Connection to nature—delighting in spending time in nature regularly.
11) Aesthetic beauty in personal environment.
12) Living in harmony with values and integrity.

This small list is by no means complete. You need to come up with your own concepts and I challenge you to do so. Adopting just 3 of these practices will transform your life. Can you imagine what your ideal life of simplicity would look like? I’d love to know. Please write to me at Eileen@tothenextlevel.net if you’d like to take up this challenge.

~Eileen Koff, CPO

Less is More: A Life Transformed

"Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all." 2 Corinthians 4:16 -17

"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself." 2 Corinthians 5:17-18

To illustrate these verses, I am reminded of the butterfly...the symbol of freedom in Christ.

Before flight comes to the butterfly, it spends a previous life as something that even its mother wouldn’t recognize. The lowly caterpillar’s only concern is to munch its way in weight, crawling belly down on the earth to find a suitable twig to form its chrysalis. The caterpillar never reasons that it is about to undergo a total transformation. It doesn’t reason with itself that the time spent in darkness will transform it into a new creature. The caterpillar can’t even dream that its former self will never again resemble the snake-like belly crawling insect it once was. Having wings and flying has never occurred to it. Sprouting wings is as unfathomable to the caterpillar as we developing human wings ourselves. The caterpillar does what God intended it to do… never reasoning, never out guessing its Creator.

Instinct overcomes the creature and willingly, in the course of its time, it locates just the right spot to spin and dangle in darkness. When the chrysalis is complete it shuts itself up and begins a transformation that culminates in a life and death struggle for freedom. For transformation to occur...struggles always ensue. The lowly caterpillar is no exception. The following story illustrates what happens to the butterfly when the struggle was cut short...when the battle for freedom was taken up by outside forces:

One day a man found a cocoon. After several days of observation a small opening appeared and he sat and watched the butterfly for what seemed like several hours as it struggled to force its body through the little hole. Then it seemed to stop making any progress. It appeared as if it had gotten as far as it could and could go no farther. Then the man decided to help the butterfly. He took a pair of scissors and snipped the remaining bit of the cocoon. The butterfly then emerged easily. Something was strange. The butterfly had a swollen body and shriveled wings. The man continued to watch the butterfly because he expected at any moment, the wings would enlarge and expand to be able to support the body, which would contract in time. Neither happened. In fact, the butterfly spent the rest of its life crawling around with a swollen body and deformed wings. It was never able to fly.

What the man in his kindness and haste did not understand, was that the restricting cocoon and the struggle required for the butterfly to get through the small opening of the cocoon are God's way of forcing fluid from the body of the butterfly into its wings. In doing so, it will be ready for flight once it has achieved its freedom from the cocoon. Sometimes struggles are exactly what we need in our life. If God allowed us to go through all our life without any obstacles, that would cripple us. Our strengths would never be perceived. Not only that...we could never fly.

Living a more simplistic life, while multifaceted, must begin with allowing God to transform us. God’s grace begins in our lives when we surrender our own desires to Him. Like the caterpillar, we cannot muster the will power on our own, nor can we gain the wisdom from outside sources. Simplicity comes into our life not by a battered and bruised struggle; simplicity comes in when we are not even aware. A new since of wonder takes over. It profoundly seeps onto our personality. A changed personality...a changed lifestyle...comes from inner promptings. One might say that even our minds are renewed with a new awareness and thoughts.

“And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.” Romans 12:2

The word "transformed" is translated from the Greek word "metamorphoo." It is from this word we get our transliterated English word, "metamorphose."

Simplicity begins with prayer. There is an intrinsic relationship between simplicity and prayer...and at the center of prayer is trust. Trusting that God will hear and will bring about the outcome according to what is His perfect will for our lives. As in the themes of the previous blogs, I touched on how trust becomes the center focus of our relationship with God. Trust, in our prayer life, moves us closer to understanding the complexities of living simply. Without a spirit of trust we would find it impossible to live on the basis of “our daily bread"...and a “just in case” mentality would rear its ugly head once more.

"Go confidently in the directions of your dreams; live the life you've imagined. As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler." - Henry David Thoreau

Anxiety's root is fear...and living simply is living free from anxiety. I also know that this is more easily said than done. I myself struggle with maintaining a balance of pleasing God and pleasing man. But this much I do know: everything in our culture strikes against the spirit of simple living. Our excessive materialistic training to acquire more and more keeps us in a constant battle with our spirit’s desire to live free from this burden. How then CAN we be free from the anxiety?

"Have no anxiety about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God." Philippians 4:6

Join me next time as we continue to unravel the mysteries of living simply.

Less is More: Simply Trust Him

In my last blog, I wrote that attempting a more simplistic life is so much easier said than done. While “simple” may denote effortlessness, I have concluded that living simply is more complex than at first observation. However, in this blog, it is my hope that a small sampling of these veiled mysteries will be revealed and that an understanding of Scripture will allow you to turn understanding into action.

You have already learned that trust in God is the single most important lesson needed to begin our new journey on how to live more simply. But sometimes, there is a struggle to learn how to live and how to make decisions that affect our life. For example, do we buy the new dishwasher or car? Are music lessons more important than braces?

Throughout the ages, God has emphasized that He seeks those that trust and obey His word. In order to trust, we must be convinced that God is faithful to keep His word and promises to us. We will now look at two profound instances in the Bible that will reveal the depth of the trust issues.

1) Starting from the beginning is a very good place to start. The very first laws that God sent to His children to give them order and direction into their life are found in the Ten Commandments. The first three commandments staccato warnings against idolatry. Idolatry is anything that attempts to align itself higher than God. The last commandment strikes at the very heart of sin…the spirit of covetousness, or the undisciplined craving of attainment for more and more.

Now don’t get me wrong, I am not proponing that having things is wrong. What I am stating is that when ambition or acquisitions become our focus or our idol, then like an alcoholic, we become so engulfed by the disease that we do not recognize the problem. God clearly warns us in His commandments that diverting from His law will lead us toward living a life separate from Him.

2) The second instance voices what Adam and Eve stated just after the fall, “We will provide for ourselves." Independence, or the attitude of self-reliance, comes at a high price. We are designed to look to God solely for our dependence and trust. When we truly realize that all we have comes from His gracious hand, then we can begin to foster a deeper trust; then we can begin to let go of our false notions that we must acquire on our own terms. Simplicity means a return to that dependency. Our intrinsic value is not tied to wealth, status, accomplishment, or position. What we have is a gift.

When we look at our material blessings, we then begin to realize that they are not for us alone, but for the good of all. God’s great generosity to us allows us to model that generosity to others. Because He gave, we are enabled to give. Living simply means that we trust God for His provisions and that what we have comes from a generous Father. Trusting frees us to give from a grateful heart, knowing that we give because we were given. Idolatry and covetness are replaced by obedience and blessing.

As we progress in our attempts to live more simply, we shall see this blessing is not in terms of materialism as touted in today’s mass media. Material blessings, while pleasant to have, turn sour when too much of a good thing becomes clutter. God’s blessing is His peace or Shalom. The vision of Shalom is captured by what Bishop John Taylor calls “the theology of enough.” I pray that you have enough understanding to begin to put thoughts into action.

In my next blog we will learn that living simply is not an action that we must strive to do, but rather, it is from God’s grace that allows simplicity to reign in our lives.

~Eileen Koff, CPO
To The Next Level